It Was Never About Me

“I Didn't Want to Go — But This Retreat Changed Something in Me” - Karol Josep

How it started:

My first Young Adult Retreat happened on May 1–2, 2026, at Lawiswis Kawayan Resort in Calumpit, Bulacan. Before we even left, I already had a reason to feel uneasy: I found out my friend and I weren't on the same team. So going in, I was surrounded mostly by people I didn't know... including my roommates.

There was a familiar voice in the back of my head saying, you're going to feel out of place here. And for a moment, I believed it.

A circle that changed things

After the orientation, each team gathered in a circle to introduce themselves. I remember being nervous... genuinely nervous. Not just the shy kind, but the kind that comes when you know you have to show up for people who don't know you yet, and you're not sure if they'll make room for you.

But they did.

As the day moved forward, something quietly shifted. People started talking to me. We shared stories... And the thing that meant the most wasn't a big moment or a dramatic breakthrough. It was the small, consistent way they made me feel included. Like they wanted me there. Not just as a warm body filling a seat, but as someone whose presence actually mattered to them.

It's a small thing on paper. But when you're someone who finds it hard to open up in unfamiliar spaces, being genuinely welcomed in feels like a lot.

The message that stuck

The most memorable thing I took home from the retreat came from Kuya Bibol. He spoke about how everything we have...our skills, our talents, our provisions wasn't given to us just for ourselves.

God didn't bless us so we could hold onto it. He blessed us so we could pour it out into others. And when we do that, people don't just see us — they see God working through us. That's the point. It's not about us at all. It's about Jesus, who was already at work in us all along.

That realization hit me in a quiet but firm way. I've spent time thinking about what I have, what I lack, what I want. But this flipped the lens entirely. The question isn't just "What do I have?"... it's "Who am I supposed to give it to?"

What I'm carrying forward

I came into that retreat as someone who wasn't really a fan of these kinds of gatherings. I left as someone who genuinely wants to come back.

It gave me courage not the loud, confident kind, but the quiet kind that makes you willing to show up even when it's uncomfortable. To sit in the circle. To share your story. To be present for people, and let them be present for you.

That's what I didn't expect. And that's exactly what made it worth going.